An LDS perspective on moving from childless to childfree living.

Saturday, May 24, 2014

License Plate Frame

Work has been so busy, and I just wanted to get through Mother's Day.  I was not very wise and went shopping on the Saturday before Mother's Day.  I went Sam's Club, Target, and the local grocery store.  When I was wished, "Happy Mother's Day" at the first two, I tried to smile, said nothing, and walked away.  I am in the grocery store regularly and know many of the people who work there, not closely, but by name.  The guy helping me at the meat counter said, "So are you excited for Mother's Day?"  I said, "It is the hardest day of the year for me."  He didn't say anything else.  I went home!

For me it is IF that makes Mother's Day hard.  I know for others who have lost their mother, it would be a hard day too.  I know my mom didn't like it when I was growing up, because it reminded her of all the things she wasn't doing as a mom. 

We did not go to church on Mother's Day.  We took my mom to lunch then made dinner to take to my MIL.  It turned out to be an okay day.

I really hadn't intended to write about Mother's Day.  It was a couple of days ago when I saw a license plate frame on a car that said, "Only the best moms get to become grandmas."  This is one I hadn't seen before, and I took offense for several reasons. 

My mom is a grandma thanks to my brother, but what if he couldn't have kids either?  That doesn't mean my mom wasn't a good mom.  I also have a couple of friends who did not marry until later in life, both marrying widows who had children and grandchildren.  My friends are now grandmas and love it!  I know that whoever was driving that car did not consider that there are women in this world who never become mothers despite many years and tens of thousands of dollars. 

I'm pretty much over it now, but at the time, it sure ruined my day!

1 comment:

  1. I am glad you made that comment to the guy at the meat counter. He might think next time.

    And yes, the thoughtlessness and arrogance behind that bumper sticker is mind-boggling. There are terrible mothers who become terrible grandmothers. There are good mothers who become grandmothers but who never see or engage with their grandchildren for a variety of reasons (disinterest, too busy enjoying being free, or because health or geography are barriers). And there are great mothers who never become grandmothers, and wonderful women who never get to be great mothers. Sending hugs to one of those wonderful women.