The Relief Society and Priesthood lesson on Sunday was on the Plan of Salvation. Both DH and I heard similar comments about how we chose or are given certain trails to help us grow.
In Elders Quorum, a member said he and his wife have a daughter who has had a couple of brain surgeries. He said that God gave them this daughter to help them grow spiritually.
In Relief Society, a member said that we either sat with God and decided together, or He decided, what trials we would have and that trials are not random.
DH and I talked about this. In the premortal existence, did DH really chose to have leukemia? Did we really chose to face infertility? We don't think so. Both of these experiences are mortal experiences that happen because we live in a fallen world in a fallen state. This doesn't make sense in relationship to my patriarchal blessing, which mentions "your children" 19 times! If my patriarchal blessing was personal revelation from God, why would he talk about my children so much if I had chosen the trial of infertility in consultation with Him?
This goes to a discussion I heard on the radio a couple of weeks ago between the DJ and a psychic. The psychic said that the end result is already determined, but the path to get there will vary based on individual experiences. Again, if we were destined to live without children according to this psychic, if DH hadn't had leukemia, something else would have been wrong causing us not to be able to have children.
I guess DH and I are more realists. We are mortal and have experiences, because we are mortal. It is believed leukemia happens due to environmental factors. Infertility for us was a result of not trying to have children before DH had leukemia. I know we both grew spiritually through these two trials, but we don't believe these trials were specifically designated for us.